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Does My Brilliance Offends You?

My mom knows that I am difficult to be close to strangers, and that I am a loner.
My closest friends know that it does not take much to make me happy, and it also takes very little to make me angry too.
I try to separate my social life and work the best I could. My best friends and work colleagues are never in the same orbit of existence.
I do try to make new friends online - and unlike many people who do hook-ups, I always tell the truth about myself. Wise men said; superb liars have excellent memories. And as lazy as I am, I try to remember as little as possible.
Back to the significance of the title above.... 
Whenever I strike a conversation with a stranger; either in a chat-room or real life, if I like him / her, I'd become extremely 'chatty'. I don't normally boast or gossip with strangers, and ALWAYS, yes always ask their opinion in any subject matter.
Some would say that I was too good to be their friend.....
Some even admitted that they were quite afraid of me (like a guy yesterday, not like I wanna do anything bad, we just talked).  
Does it hurt to befriend someone who speaks the truth about you?
Do they really enjoy being served with daily little lies like canapes on a tray?
Were they intimidated by a superior (and evil) mind?


Sometimes I wonder why humans behave such way. It is the truth; a true friend is harder to find than pearls amidst the sands. 
Should I wear a mask (i.e. act) to become the monster friend they can handle?

26 comments:

TechnoBabe said...

I think I understand what you are saying here. You say it is being a monster to be insincere and false in conversations with people. You believe it is better to be truthful even if it isn't received well by the person you speak to. For me, I always like the truth. If someone tells me they don't like what I wrote or they disagree with something I say, I am okay with it. That makes life interesting. I don't understand why some people would want to be lied to or have people kissing up to them. That is not a real relationship because it is based on lies. So in essence it would be a big waste of time. So I guess overall I agree with your philosophy.

GypsyFox The Glamorous Betty Crocker said...

this post is perfect, I can sooo relate to it.. I have lost a lot of friends for being straight up with them, I have even got into it with family members as well.. LOL I sometimes feel I should keep my mouth shut, but I have this saying "I'd rather be hated for what I am than loved for what I'm not."

Casey Freeland said...

I have mixed feelings here. Honesty is usually the best policy, but in social situations there are degrees. That's not the same as lying, however. You can be considerate, kind, gentle with someone and not spout off with things you consider the truth that may also hurt them. If someone directly asks a question, they deserve a direct, honest answer. Otherwise, a little social skill can go a long way.

Just my opinion of course.

Casey

Choco said...

Ahh... Am not a loner..And I don't go into chat rooms and am very very wary of whom I befriend.

I feel that there is a difference..big difference between being friendly and being friends.
Now one can get confused initially and mistake friendliness for friendship. I know I might be making little sense. But I have come to the conclusion that being friendly means white lies...all over the place...you know..love your new dress..nice house..yada yada. Being nice with lots of space. Being in the relationship for the fun of it. Or cause of work/hobby etc

Now if you are real good friends, trust each other and understand each other well, then you can spill the truth. Provided they can take it off course! :)

PS: Like I would prefer if the MP3 on your blog page would not start playing automatically. Cause it then interrupts with the song already playing on my computer! And see. The candid me is new to your blog, but has still gone ahead and said so! :D
Cheers!

Tenchi said...

Well...I just like the way u are...straight to the point no henki pengki...true sometime the truth people will not like to listen or accept...they are happy to live in their own fantasy...

U are always is the Ramzu Zahini I known for all these years...got 10 years ar?

Rock Chef said...

I for one love your openness and honesty. Keep it like this, if people can't handle it then that is their problem.

You might scare some people away, but those who remain are those who like the real you, not some internet facade.

et said...

Thats one wonderful, honest post shadow.

I like to be honest with friends. With my best friends i mean. It always should be so. There's no true satisfaction we can gain after a day of acts and pretensions.

But when we met people, in this all so sophisticated society, I do not always incline on sharing everything. Cuz there can be situations when we regret it. What if we eventually find out these guys never wanted to know that much, or what if they never deserved. This is one complicated test that we face everyday..

Aizan Suhaira said...

Oh well. Like I've mentioned before. We are like durians. People either love us or loathe us.

Unfortunately or fortunately (depends on how you see it), there is no in between.

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Technobabe; They talked to me and was frightened with what they see - a brilliant monster. Should I tone the unholy aura down a notch? :)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

GypsyFox; True. Fortunately I am a natural loner or I'd die being a social outcast :)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Casey Freeland; I have fantastic social skills Mr Freeland :) That's why I can still work in the school, or the teachers and students would avoid me like the plague!

This is about finding another person who accepts us the way we are.

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Choco; Awwwww..... but I like that Lollipop song! You can always click pause / stop when my blog is loading. And I TREASURE every comment.

Critics rule! (i am one too)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Tenchi; We also live in our fantasy world, what?! Ha ha ha.

Ours are even bigger and better than theirs, right?

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Rock Chef; I do scare a lot of people for a living (literally). But those many who still loves me are the students who understand that I just want to instill the fear of the future in them. (got lazy, fail exams, no job, die alone... etc)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

et; True. Let's trust no one after this :)

But, but.... I am such an amazing character!!! I need to tell the world how awesome I am :)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Aizan; Yeah, though I am a bit sad at times, I am happy still with the one I am with.... :)

mentalie said...

i'd say it's definitely easier to be lied to, than to lie :)

Casey Freeland said...

Well I accept you, evil and all. :)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

mentalie; That goes without saying...

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Casey Freeland; Aww... shucks.. That means a lot from you :)

Grayquill said...

Came your way via Candid Talk -
We all have told the white lies. I think it is better not to say anything at all about the dress if you don't like it - why violate your own sense of right and wrong? If you feel you have to say something, maybe, "That is a DRESS!" but then she might ask what that means and the ship will sink.
I think Candid Talk had it right in her comment. There are our friend and those we are friendly to.
Thanks for the thought provoking post.

Eveline said...

Hello there sunshine. I read all of it. I believe in all of it. You see...I'm a pro-choice, gay-loving, human rights-loving, civil rights-loving, liberal feminist bitch. But I will say.....a true friend is someone you want to have on your side (at least one)...I feel that our ideas of friendship are flawed in a big way and that keeping the ones who lie to your face to make you feel good because your head is too stuffy to take it...is one too many :)

Oh...and I know I hardly know you (this is my first time here) but I already love you :)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Grayquill; I do try not to be impolite. But yes, many say that the truth hits hard on (people) life.
I do like to make waves my own way anyway :)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Eveline; :) Thanks, sister. It is nice to know an unusually oriented girl who knows how to express herself here :) Used to be friends with many when I was younger, but alas, as I grew older (and a teacher to boot), all must be PROPER.
That sucks...

Vyazz said...

To be very honest, when it comes to meeting new people I find it better to be candid. Candid about myself though.
Actually it makes things a lot more easier. At least that way, you don't have to put on an image throughout the time.
The same goes for me.
I love it when people speak their minds out to me. (which they invariably do)
I love listening to people, and doling out advice now and then.
Sometimes I think it would be so cool if I was a shrink. But there's not much money in that in India...so I dropped that idea!!! ;)

Shadowthorne @ Ramzu Zahini said...

Vyazz; Long time no see :) I do the candid stuff with my close friends and colleagues. Oh you looked so serious before we knew you... Who knew you are actually very funny.
I got that a lot :)
I want to be a shrink too...
But some say I'd damage the mind a lot more than fixing it :)

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