The School Was Burgled Last Night!! (yet again)

For the 3rd time this year, our school was 'raped' by some irresponsible individuals, which I believed to be some long gone ex-students of ours. I believe this to be so because the thieves knew which rooms to hit for maximum loot - mainly the school office, the staffroom and the coop. Let the pictures do the talking. 

 The door to the office. The aluminium panel pried and the door was open in force.

The steel grill of the office. The padlock was cut with a heavy duty metal cutter. See how enterprising 

our ex students can be?

The desk of a teacher in the staffroom. Those boys really sacked her place to look for spare change.

Desk of another teacher.... Those dastardly ingrates. This teacher was recently posted here a couple of months ago.

The desk next to me, a lady friend lost a laptop computer and some money she was saving for some students. The computer was placed inside a lock drawer under her desk and as you see, it was wide open (drawer now on the floor, far from the desk).

And last but not least, yours truly own desk. Nope, its supposed to look like that - messy. What irked me the most was, the thieves stole my Flash Scrabble set!!! I have cursed violently inside the entire day, hoping their legs to explode and their spawns born unbelievably dense. 

Now you see what a little education can do for some people. Sorry, I am still sulking over my lost toy :(

I've Gone Beyond Anger With You

What would you do if some students decided it is very OK to disobey the school rules? What would you say to a couple of students who always arrived late to school without any plausible reason? What action can you take if a boy refused to tuck-in his school uniform in class?


The challenges of modern teachers today.... it's not about teaching young minds to their best limit. It is to discipline these rowdy buggers and not having them broken (well mostly) at the end of the day.


As volatile and draconian I can be, I DO love my students - but not all. I love those who obeys, who finishes his / her homework on time, who keeps silence on cue (e.g. Mount Teacher about to go boom), who always greet their elderly well, who dresses well to school, who has their workplace tidy etc.


I hope I wasn't asking for too much.


Children will behave as children... but those kids who can think beyond their age will go far.


Yesterday, as I was teaching a class of 16 year olds about the principle of thermodynamics, I've noticed three boys who sat by the window had their faces down on the desk, sleeping or pretending to be.


I had enough. And usually I would lash out some rather degrading remarks on such ignorant youngsters.... Then I remembered that I had dished TOO many advice, TOO many scoldings, TOO much love on these particular boys. So I told the rest of the attentive students;


"Now, I've gone beyond anger with you. I just cannot be mad with you anymore."
"But why sir? What do you mean?"
"I realized that while most of you do care for your future, it is not so for a few friends of yours. I've spent too much energy scolding people, and as I do not wish to have high blood pressure at my age, I think I'll just let you be, and do as you please."
"But they are only a few...." (the boys were still immobile)
"That is why, my fondest regards and wishes go to those who LISTENS to me. As you are not my children and you know my stand against disobedient students; it is imperative for you to be on my good side for your own good. For example, as I have no interest to scream at you now, that does not mean I will not slash a huge chunk off your marks from this coming test. An eye for an eye. Keep on sleeping."


And they woke up....


Tell me if I do wrong. Or do you prefer physical punishment? Oh, and the school counselor is a friend of mine and I do sent a lot of problematic kids her way. 


I've gone beyond anger...... to the calm seas of I-Don't-Care....

Tales From The School 2

"Where's your da*n assignment?" I was fuming in front of the class. The teacher's table was between us, fortunately, or my claws should have sunk into his chest.


"I left it at home," his voice was so low, reminiscence of the pesky mosquito. The entire class was already quiet with abated breath.


"And why is that? Lie to me and only God can help you as I will make sure your entire future flushed down the drain!" Yes, I CAN do that. Ask your nearest teacher for assistance.


"....."


"Speak louder."


"I was watching football. And I overslept."


...... anger raised like an evil tide inside me. World Cup or not, the class must go on.


"Tell me. Do these football players you reverently watched last night know you live and study here?"


"No."


"Did they tell you to watch them on tv and ask you to forget your assignment?"


"No."


 "Are they here now to help you answer your excuses? Did you get a single cent watching them play at the wee hour of the morning?!" 


"No."


"So you know who is at fault here. Not football. But you. Now go to that corner and complete three times the original amount of assignment I gave you. And I want it finished by tomorrow morning."


I rarely give out assignments, but when I do, it pours!


And YES, I got something against the World Cup. People shouldn't give excuses and accuses the ball. You watch it, then you will pay for it (at work and school). 

Get A Backbone!! Aren't We Vertebrates?!!

I just had the unfortunate luck to accidentally watch a few minutes of local drama on the tv this evening. There was this scene when a freshman was viciously bullied by a couple of senior students. No body contact, just a lot of abusive and degrading word exchange. The bullied boy just cringed and made pitiful faces at his tormentors.

I just had to shout this aloud (in front of my mom, who loves that muck of a programme) "SPINELESS FOOL!!!"

I remembered my first year in the university. We also had a tough orientation, but as a surprisingly 'different-minded' individual, those senior buffoons just gave me a wide berth. Nope, I wasn't so highly brilliant they were afraid to mock, I was just, oh you can say, very hard to intimidate.

Once in a late evening, the seniors called all freshmen to attend a meeting in the common room. It ended up being a waste of sleeping time, the bloody fools just wanted an audience for them to talk and ramble about non-specific things. And I had my fill, stood up and just left the place, returned back to my room and sleep. My idiot peers stayed and endured the torture until 4.00 in the morning.

The next day, a few seniors confronted me in the cafeteria, asking why I left so early. I just look at their faces and then made sweeping glances to their feet and back to the faces. Thrice. I said I was not that stupid to receive advice from average students. I am my own man. I do not need your help.

One of them tried to lunge at me. I just smiled and told him that I am aware that the campus had no fighting cases reported for a very very long time. He would do well to remember that, and I added a proverb in Malay (translated); "Before kicking a dog, look out for its master". (Meaning, before harming someone, you must be aware of his parents / guardians).  

I was left well alone after that. Infamous. Some of my friends said I was a fool to shun help from the seniors as they can provide notes of coming lectures and exams. I had help from the seniors all right, without them knowing. I befriended the Chinese students instead (they never bully each other) and got tonnes of notes from my new best friends. Que sera sera.

My university years were indeed colourful. Next time I might tell you people how I got kicked out of campus and almost made national news! :)  

The Few Days Before the Hols

Very hectic these few days I just don't believe myself to work SO authentically busy! (Because most of the time, I'd just let everything burn and just slip away to have fun elsewhere). This must be a very bad dream.

Anyway, I finished most of the paperworks (am very good with last minute 'creative' work. Creative meaning, spin finished workloads out of thin air. Fiction, geddit?). Filing is a chore, and I never seem to get a grip on it though it is always in my New Year's resolution. Oh OK, 'Get a grip on the filing system in Year 2010'.

Entertaining the receding number of students is not really difficult as the bad seeds are already gone, celebrating early school holiday. I just let them do whatever they want - play board games, read comics / books, talk etc. I just need to stand, walk and knuckle a few heads if they got rowdy or too noisy.  

Oh, and somebody told everybody that I will become the new Prefect teacher next year. At last, the time of the Sith has come, my apprentice.... Ops, wrong script!!

They will not know what will hit them next year. (Evil grin, pause, and then evil laugh. With 'Imperial March' as the soundtrack).

Shape Your Own Future 'Cause I Don't Even Care

Sometimes, all these years, I encountered a few students I just hate to see in class. These are the students who ALWAYS refuse to do what they are told. Students who dressed not according to school regulation. Students with high opinion of themselves (a.k.a. deluded). And the bane of them all - STUPID AND RUDE. (I can tolerate stupid students, but the combination of these qualities always make my hands itch to rip their hearts out).

So whenever I teach, I will always refuse to have eye contact with these sub-humans. Oh bo hoo hoo, you had a tough life at home and you came from a broken family... But that does not give you the right to make people's life difficult. There is no reason for you to bother other students who are really interested to learn. You ignored every piece of advice and you expect me to respect you?! Which confused universe you came from that provides special help to a thankless piece-of-turd like you?

I am writing this, a voice of a million teachers / educators around the planet who had the pleasure to meet such individuals.

I shall never pray for your success. I don't even want your thanks. I have the other 98-99% students who really need my help. I am human after all.

And for those who think that this is a very unprofessional entry by a teacher, please give me some advice to deal with these unsavory youngsters (who would never listen to you, and also treated you like dirt).

p.s. - very bad day with bad bad bad students. And yes people, I met many teachers in the psychiatric ward when I was posted there in 2000. People can end up mad if the anger was bottled up. Beware my fellow teachers, beware. 

The Future Is In Your Own Hands

Tomorrow is the end of the exam week... and then we have another two weeks before the school holidays (Yippeee!)

I didn't like exams when I was a student. But I NEVER sleep in any like this student of mine did. He started sleeping on the first 25 minutes of the Mathematics paper. 

Do not judge me harshly by saying I was an irresponsible teacher for allowing students to sleep during exam. I DID warn him not to. Twice.

So what if he ignores me (the student is rather impolite and have a high opinion of himself), he is not my son anyway. As a teacher, IT IS my job pointing to the right path. But if some individuals are so keen to destroy their own future, I just let them be.

Youngsters nowadays are so stuck up with themselves. Some think fate will rearrange itself to accommodate them. I'd LOVE to see when that happen...

True Tales; The Unfortunate Boy and Society's Trash

Let me tell you a true story about two friends who also happens to be students of mine...

X (real name cannot be disclosed for secrecy sake) is a shy and quiet boy who rarely expressed an opinion in my Physics class. He is also very clever, but alas, like a smashed mirror, all brilliance but still, a broken item (I will tell you why in a moment).

Y is an extrovert kind of person, who'll bug you everywhere, at anytime of the day. He's not really bright, but he can be quite helpful if he puts his mind into the job.

Both X and Y, in my professional opinion, are not really 'right' in the head, but not in a bad way.

So anyway, one morning, a few days ago, X and Y decided to visit me during the weekend, by bus. My esteemed mother asked me the same morning to buy a notebook computer for my handicapped brother, and gave me a lot of money for the purchase. So I called up the boys and told them to stay put at the bus stand, so I could pick them up to accompany me to the city. This they did.

So the three of us went to a computer store where I bought an Acer notebook computer immediately (because it's not mine and I was a bit annoyed to be woken very early just to do shopping for others). "What you want to do next?" I asked my students because I don't have the afternoon planned.

"Let's go to the movies," they said. I agreed because it's a hobby of mine anyway.

So we drove to the nearest cinema and I bought 3 tickets for the 4.00 pm show (because we missed the 2.00 pm show for 'FarCry'). Then I let the boys roam the mall, as long as they didn't do anything stupid that require my attendance.

I received a call soon after, from an unknown number;

"Is this Mr Ramzu?"

"Yes."

"Where are you?"

"I am somewhere near a cinema?"

"You are going to watch a movie?"

"Maybe. Who is this?"

"I am X's mother."

I will not continue the dialogue , but will tell the gist of it. She is ANNOYED that I brought her son to an INAPPROPRIATE place (cinema/mall). She said I was IRRESPONSIBLE and SELFISH. She said her brilliant son would be scarred for life, being somewhere near places with BAD INFLUENCE. She went on and on and on. I was quiet because 1. My parents never teach me to talk back to older people and 2. She has all the right to be angry for her son and 3. I am not that stupid to start an argument.

And when knowing her son is going out with Y, she commented thus;

"Isn't Y the Trash of Society?" ('Trash of Society' refers to people who contributed zero, useless individuals, e.g. drug addicts, snatch thieves etc). Y is not an excellent boy in study or behavior, yet a mother calling another's child such is completely unacceptable for me.

So, after she hung up, I rounded up her son and Y and immediately started the journey to send them back home, thus abandoning the cinematic activity. X was very adamant about my decision, because he really wanted to watch a movie. He told me that he has NEVER been in an outing with friends (that was his FIRST), and also never been to a cinema (unlike most of his peer, 17 yrs olds). X was never good at expressing his feeling, and after talking to his parent, now I understood why my student behaves oddly. Something is wrong at home.

When I was his age, even younger, my parents would persuade me to go outside and 'get a life'. They even gave me money to go to the cinema or anywhere I like as long as I got back home in the evening. They knew I am bright enough not to be caught in any sticky situation.

So I pity X because from what I witnessed and information from his friends, plus from himself, this unfortunate boy has 'no life' (normal social life). I can predict the outcome in the far future, but I would not be too specific here. Let's say when you fenced a young one, he'll fly away and never return when the opportunity comes. I told X to prepare for this future, but never get into an argument with his parents. Sometimes people do hard things for love.

As for Y, he said he was used to it. I told him to buck up and change his way, or the infamous tittle would be truly his, years to come.

For the first time in my 7 years career as a teacher, a parent had called me IRRESPONSIBLE. I wish I can sit down with this particular woman and tell her that sometimes, an accusation like that can be harmful to people's state of mind.

I will remember this.

Viva Le Furet!!

I studied French for two years (1994-95) as it was compulsory for boarding school students to take up a foreign language. It is a beautiful language, but a horror to remember all those grammar things. But what we love most were the songs, and one of the songs is "Il court il court".

Il court, il court, le furet

Le furet du bois, Mesdames,
Il court, il court, le furet,
Le furet du bois joli.

Il est passé par ici,
Il repassera par là.

Il court, il court, le furet
Le furet du bois, Mesdames,
Il court, il court, le furet,
Le furet du bois joli.

My French teacher told us that it was a song about a missing cat, running around the place, and a pretty cat he was too. The singer(s) was supposed to ask people where the cat was. She told us that 15 years ago...

And I googled 15 minutes ago, and I FOUND OUT that 'furet' is actually French for ferret!!! Well, well, well. We've been singing that particular children song for years and thought it was about a cat! And I've never seen an actual ferret all my life until last year. Hurm....

An announcement; My ferret Kaos has finally met his roommate, another sable ferret of 2 months old, named Pingu (yes, after a penguin). I have two ferrets now. Mwa ha ha ha ha!

Of Exams and the Easiest Job On the Planet

Exam week is finally around the corner for the rest of the students. Above is of the trial PMR exam for Form 3 (15 years old) which was held last week. I didn't teach these students but I took some pictures anyway for the school records (and mine too).

I rarely revise for any exams when I was a student. Yes, I was sloppy and lazy. You can say I might not even care if I passed or not. But for some fantastic luck, I didn't do that badly after all.

I teach Science to Form 2 students and Physics for Form 4 and 5. I just love teaching Science because I know I am bloody good at it. But teaching Physics to students with average intelligence is an uphill battle. I cannot be hard on them or they'll lose interest. Too much play and nothing gets into those thick skulls.

Before this, I wrote an entry about being a teacher is not the easiest job. But hey, during exam weeks, it should be. No extra classes, no co-curriculum activities and of course, no teaching. We just sit and monitor the students taking the exam. But usually I take up a good book and read the while away while some students cheat and copy right under my nose.

Well, at least they made an effort not to fail, right? The purpose justify the method, no matter how crooked. But I hope they'll learn soon enough that in REAL exams, harsh and deliberate actions will be taken if they are caught.

I warned them. Thrice.

p.s. - for your info, I DID copy during my SPM exam in 1995 and was never caught. It was during Physics... Now I am doomed to teach the subject for all eternity. Ironic.

Appaloosa And Sex

I don't watch tv much nowadays because I am simply disgusted with the many soap operas and silly programmes which are aired. Seriously, I can feel my IQ slipping whenever I 'accidentally' watched some local drama on the telly. These are the garbage programmes which have no intellectual values and useful information whatsoever. [Most are about struggling love, pretentious power hungry people or just the endless drama of one particular family. SAME OLD SAME OLD]. No wonder many people are so zombie-like; they are programmed to be stupid by the broadcast.

And then you might point your accusing finger at me; What about the movies you watch at the cinema? Well, that is not a useless investment for me. I greatly learn English (good, bad, and even the naughty) from the movies. I get to see different places, real or fabricated. Movies now are so advanced, we can see some technologies that we can only imagine in our wildest dream work (my fav; red crystal light sabers).

And sometimes I refer to a specific movie or two for Scientific examples. Eg; the nuclear submarine scene in Pierce Brosnan's The World Is Not Enough - harnessing nuclear power in Physics. The huge radioactive monster in Godzilla - mutation in cells by radiation. Why you cannot kick a wall down, but Superman can - force and motion. I think I am the only teacher in school who use such examples in class...

Anyway, after watching Watchmen on dvd last night (nice thoughtful action movie, fabulous casts), I watched the cowboy flick by Ed Harris, Appaloosa. It was different, it was strange and it was full of sex. Not graphic, just the heavy tint of sex, and its consequences. (Renee Zellweger as Miss French; the trollop @ unsatiated bitch @ respected hooker. Ed Harris as Virgil Cole, the peacemaker who fell in love with the aforementioned trollop). I think Viggo Mortensen potrayal as Everett Hitch was very cool. We should have more cowboy films like this, but hold the sex please. If I want sex, I'd better watch porn. (Anyway, if I had an unfaithful lover like Miss French, I'd blew her brains out the first chance I get, which never happen in the movie).

Oh and I watched G.I. Joe two days ago. It was fun, but very chaotic. The plot did not matter much when you only wanna see the action. Oh and as you might have guessed, I rooted for C.O.B.R.A. when I was very young too.

Deceptive, Impolite and Vicious Buggers

I was referring to the youngsters today, mainly from what I see in my own students. OK ok, the number of said people is miniscule but as the saying goes, a drop of ink paints the whole glass of water black.

These are the hardcore students. They refuse to hand in homeworks and assignments. Never pay attention in class. Sowing discord and chaos among peer. Encouraging others to follow them suit. Sometimes I GREATLY pity the parents of such children. I believe that the fates of parents and their children are intertwined. If the child did badly, the family would suffer the consequences. This I preached almost on a daily basis in class. Yet somehow, some people would never care less.

I believe in public and corporal punishment in school. But UNFORTUNATELY the World believe that the brutal way to shape discipline is unjust and redundant. So, when a teacher is unable to control his / her students, he / she is in hot soup. Not every teacher can inspire respect and love from students. Teachers are human too, with flaws and minds of their own. A person like me can never have the everlasting love of my students, but I KNOW I will be remembered till their dying days (from the way I teach)... Yes, the kind of teacher you always remember and told your sons, daughters and grandchildren about.

The teachers of ancient times got it too easy. Students SEEK them for knowledge and the transfer of wisdom is much easier when the students are very willing to study (the reason they seek the teacher in the first place). This millennia, its the other way around, youngsters are not interested much to gain knowledge and the teachers must push hard to make better people of reluctant individuals. I blame materialistic wealth and the easy life we have now. No pain, no gain. They never feel any hardship, so they never try harder to gain more.

Isn't it CRUELTY to force knowledge down the throats of the unwilling? Yes or No.

If I was the Prime Minister, I'd make school NOT compulsory. So the lazy useless bums can stay at home and the real future builders of our nation can study in peace. There is a highway to Hell and it is paved by the no desire to improve oneself.

Evil Teacher Strikes Again

Parents are allowed to come into class today for the 'Meet the Teachers' programme. This is held twice a year, after the mid term and the final term exams. Parents are briefed about the school's policy and they can ask the teachers about the performance of their children in class.

I am the class teacher of 2 C. There are 14 boys and 15 girls under me and I have their result sheets in my hands. I have a lot of things to say to visiting parents... Let's say today is a good day for revenge.

So the influx of parents started at 9.00 am. There were more parents than I expected, but no matter. I used to stutter when I was young but this grown man has a new nickname - Silvertongue, I can talk my way to people's destruction.

Parents were surprised. Parents were saddened. Parents were angered (not at me). Woe to the students who vexed me in class. I told EVERYTHING to their parents. The laziness. The truancy. The rudeness. And a couple of fathers SLAPPED their precious daughters in front of the entire class, so ashamed of their own spawns. Tears were shed, not that I care.

I've warned them before. Cross me and you'll get what you deserve. I was actually smiling while other people were in shock.

But I was not a complete beast, ok? Good and polite students (I treasure these more than clever students) received glowing praises from me. And the look on their parents' faces were of pride and joy. We talked about the children progress and most parents just agreed whatever advice I recommended for them.

Tomorrow is another schooling day. And after school I'm going to watch 'Transformers 2' with eleven people I work with. :)

Ruining lives (of snobbish students) is a hard but satisfying work. :)

And I've read this quote somewhere by Alfred Hitchcock;

"Revenge is sweet and not fattening." How true.

The Solution Is So Obvious - Just READ!!!

The Government (via the Minister of Education) is asking the people how to improve English among students...

I am so simply flabbergasted. Are people really that foolish? Do we have to invent reasons to be stupid? Are we really blind to the plight of the generation-Z's education?

And as sure as rain THEY would formulate new and outrageously redundant programs for teachers to force knowledge down the throats of unwilling young people. MORE work for teachers, and LESS learning will happen. Is this what we want?

To improve English, heck, any language at all, all we have to do is practice and READ. Talk the talk and read the subject matter. So bloody obvious and it has been done for thousands of years!

My late father said something like this once;"You will never learn unless you fear for your future."

I think it is the WISEST decision to make English a compulsory subject to pass for every major exam. Let the FEAR comes to those bleak hearted and empty minded fools.

Of e-Books and Real Books

Many blogs that I am following now mentioned about books and of course about what to do with them - read. Books come in many types, size and volumes. I love books and most of the books I had during my secondary school were stolen from friends and the library. Ok, I am someone who admits his wrong-doings because it is the manly thing to do. What's wrong to acquire the books nobody read? (or in my friends case, they finished reading and then just put them under their desk).

I read and hear about e-books and free digital books online with envy. I love good books, but I love FREE books better. I have three bookcases full of books (stolen and honestly acquired) at home and there is no more space for new books.

But seriously, a good book is like your best friend. It keeps you company and amuses you.

Erm... I was looking for this particular book; Ferrets For Dummies - which is said to be the best and most popular ferret book in the market. I REALLY want this book.  

But OF COURSE this book cannot be found anywhere in ol Malacca town, heck, even Borders and the great Kinokuniya of KL! I was angry, I was lost, I almost gave up.

And then I remembered my favourite past time a long time ago before I terminated my internet-line service. Downloading video torrents... yes, stealing from the net and then sharing them with the world - ONLINE PIRACY. Well, last night I try searching for this ferret book torrent and voila! There are many of them online, free for the taking - the full version.

It took me less than 5 minutes to download, and I was happily reading the 400 odd pages (using Acrobat) moments later. Why oh why I didn't do this earlier? Silly me.

But I still prefer real books than e-books. You can touch the pages, riffle through it, thumb the pages, smell the paper and even throw it away if it contains crap. It's too much a hassle to scroll the digital pages and change the size view for a comfortable read.

Ok, I pledge never to use the power of internet piracy to download books I don't really want. (You believe me?)

Which do you prefer? Digital or paper? 

Of Communism and Hans Christian Andersen

I was reading the newspaper this morning (Ok ok, I am STILL avoiding tv news) - "Govt Will Not Allow Chin Peng To Return." He is the former Communist Party of Malaya leader, and was considered a great threat to the country during the Emergency 1948 - 1981. Mr ex-Communist was deported out of Malaysia several years ago and now some idiot of a politician is trying to bring him back because "he no longer posed a threat and as such the government should consider allowing him to return on humanitarian grounds".

I call that a tasteless sort of joke. This man and his minions had killed so many people during their insurgence, terrorized the country and that successfully put himself into the darkest annals of Malaysian history. Why suddenly you want to come back after the long exile? Feeling old and suddenly missing the Motherland? Go and bite the dust Chin Peng!

Personally, communism IS NOT really a bad idea from what I have read (before and now). 

"Communism in the Marxian (1848) sense refers to a classless, stateless and oppression-free society where decisions on what to produce and what policies to pursue are made democratically, allowing every member of society to participate in the decision-making process in both the political and economic spheres of life." - Wikipedia   [See what I mean?]

UNFORTUNATELY, people drifted from this pure ideology of communism, and only a select few dictates the fate of the majority, which is very very bad decision. Hurm, I will not pursue this topic further or some might get the idea that I am supporting communism in this fair country.

Anyway, I finished reading a fairy tales book by Christian Anderson (the unabridged edition). Long ago I read about the Brothers Grimm, they collected folk tales from the German people and compiled them in a book. Most of the stories are not suitable for younger children - all about blood, death, deceit and evil plots. My fav author also mentioned in one of his books that fairy tales were indeed about 'blood (violence) and sex'. This is VERY true. So please slap yourself in the face and read the original fairy tales, not the short and revised versions for children under 5.

When a hero fell in love with a beautiful girl he met somewhere in the woods - Isn't that about lust-at-first-sight @ sex? How can a mermaid have sex with a young and handsome prince? So the slut had her fishtail exchanged with a pair of legs (sounds like a very bad joke). The SCANDAL! All because of so called-love (not)!

We have read the many abuse Cinderella ('Ashputtel' in original German) endured because she was meek and timid - violence. How about Jack who felled the beanstalk, the bloody thief who just added murder (of the poor giant) and environment destruction (the beanstalk) to his credo? Jack is a TERRORIST, people!!

Don't tell me you enjoyed reading about his adventures (in the land above the clouds, via magic beanstalk) and actually thought of his theft of the golden harp and the hen that laid golden eggs as righteous!! PLEASE feel sorry for the big and ugly giant who fell to his death because of this evil and VIOLENT kid. Big and ugly does not mean you are evil. *snif*

I hope this short entry can open up your mind to the truths about fairytales.    

p.s.

- I pity Sauron from 'Lord of the Rings', he had waited hundreds of years for his ring, which was stolen-by-force from him. Tch tch tch. And you wonder why I want the Shire to burn? :) Oh and I hope I am not offending anyone with this post. Just trying a new spectrum of writing here.

                                                          The horny little bi**h of the sea.

Words From An Educated Psychopath 4

"Nope, it's too late now. Heaven's Door was closed last week." - when they hear the rumour that I will give extra marks to those who gave presents during Teacher's Day and want to give me more gifts now. 

"Yes I can finish this today, but will take you till the End of Days with your wonderful grip of the language." - when asked by a student if I was able to finish a very thick book I stole from the library.

The 2nd Night at The Museum and The Things that Can Make You Puke

How nice it is to be a popular teacher... Erm yesterday a couple of last year students asked me out on a movie-and-dinner-date (ok ok, both are boys) to celebrate the belated Teacher's Day (I still have a few presents on my desk from slow-coaches). We went to watch 'Night at The Museum 2'.

I wanted to watch 'Aliens Vs Monsters' at first but the show was only at midnight and as an (grudgingly) understanding person, I settled for second best - Museum. (I watched X-Men, Star Trek, Push, and Angels & Demons already).

Let's see... the movie was ok. Bigger than ever, with new casts and more action. It would draw chuckles and grins but never out-loud laughs. I fondly remembers the banter between Kahmunrah (Hank Azaria) and Ben Stiller regarding hostage exchange - its a classic playground quarrel. :) And what's so terrible about Ivan? He said he was actually Ivan the 'Awesome'. Mwa ha ha ha!

But really. They can do even better than this. I'm not rushing to buy a dvd of this, meaning it's not a memorable movie to share with my grandchildren. Ha!

Anyway after the movie we went to the Chicken Rice Shop for dinner. It was rather cute to see my students excusing themself 'to do something' before entering the eatery. I knew they wanted to go to the ATM and furiously culculating the cost after looking at the menu. *Evil grin*

So we had our dinner with me GRACIOUSLY not ordering extravagantly, even though I obviously not going to pay for anything. And here it comes lads...

I found a very long strand of hair in my fav dish - kailan in oyster sauce. We sent it back for a new plate. Oh and wait.... my student found a rather large ant in his ice-lemon tea drink. We also sent this back with the waiter apologizing profusely. And all bad things must come in threes.... My OTHER student found an eyelash on his plate while he was almost finished.

Wow. I am not a fussy eater but I imagine some people just cannot tolerate these abuses. I remembered being a health-inspector during my practical - and I personally closed several eating shops MERCILESSLY because of their bad hygiene (and maybe I was a brutal bugger). Well, it's something to remember and as a cutting repartee before departing to the cashier - "You guys must have some hairfall disease in the kitchen to serve us such delicacy. Don't do this again. Some people can use this to sue you."

Hope you guys have a swell weekend - free of any hair in your meals.

The 'hairy' meal finished. See? Waste not, want not.

Mission Accomplished : Mount Presents

Today is Teacher's Day in school. And I arrived in school much later than usual brandishing two digital cameras (my own Sony-H3 and an Ixus) because I am the school un-official photographer. I love taking pictures, and I am VERY good at it (not the pictures taken with my mobile phone though, those are of low quality). I began the morning with taking candid pictures of the teachers all over the school. 

I am sorry. But these old female teachers THREATEN to kill me if I put their pictures in my blog. And they will check frequently. :( *snif* There goes my opportunity to make fun on other's expenses.

Anyhoo (as the Australians would say), the reason for this entry is.... YES, I ACHIEVED A MOUNTAIN OF GIFTS ON MY DESK!!! MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA!! 1 000 x  The secondary objective to make the other teachers green with envy was also successful.

And they accused me of forcing my students to give the presents. Ok, ok, I admit I did the dastardly deed last year. But this year (if you follow my 'Words from An Educated Psychopath') I only ask them what they wanted to give me. It's a huge difference, right?

Ok, enough gloating for now. I have a snippet of my students' 'dikir barat' during the performance for teachers this afternoon. Hope you like them. :) [Sorry for the lousy sound. I was sitting at the very front, on the steps, next to the huge speaker]

Oh, and I will take a photo of my presents tomorrow (if none were stolen).

                                    

No Angels, Only Demons and Tom Hanks

After school I went to watch the much awaited 'Angels and Demons' movie adapted from the book of the person who called himself Dan Brown. 

My verdict? It's an a OK film. For you people who had experience both 'The Da Vinci Code' in book and movie, 'Angelina & Brad' ops! 'Angels and Demons' offers the same roller coaster ride of; "Hey look! There's another hint / clue / thing." And then the chase against the clock to get to some location and yes, deja vu; "Hey look! There's another hint / clue / thing."

I am not spoiling the film for you by telling how the plot goes, because it was indeed twisted and rather clever. But hey, as an ardent movie fan, I CAN guess the flow of the story and so many 'I told you so' irked the friend next to me.

The book was set before the event of 'the Da Vinci Code'. But I think 'the Da Vinci Code' is a much better movie than this one. And we gain knowledge what the Vatican City looks like and how a Pope was selected. We are indeed 'Enlightened' = Illuminati. Mwa ha ha ha ha!

p.s. - Don't expect to see any angels or satanic creatures in this movie. But expect demons in human forms.