I Was Born Different - It's Not My Fault

I am not handicapped, or suffering from any chronic illnesses. I am not really good looking, but no one ever called me ugly either. I am just different in the head. Inside. The. Mind.


When I was a wee little boy of seven or eight, I already had bad thoughts concerning murdering certain people I didn't like and stealing stuff I fancied. So young, yet so evil. (Now you know why I got two Damien pictures in this blog, because I looked like him too - with my bowl cut hair).


But I knew my thoughts were VERY impure. And I spent most of my young life seeking things to amuse myself and trying not to think about the bad stuff. I didn't want to be the first ever serial killer preschooler :)


And I grew up different - inside. The saying goes; It's not your mother's fault you are born that way - which is very true. Being different makes you stand out of the normal circle. You can observe the normal joes and janes living their mundane life and when the spotlight almost hit you, jump again into the circle to mingle and BE NORMAL (for awhile). 


That's among the reason why I am so fabulously good in acting. We hide our true self so others wont run away. Showing your true colour monster demon self in this time and age is akin to career suicide. If Frankenstein had a proper plastic surgery, even he could live among the villagers in peace. I am rambling...


So once in a while, the REAL YOU who lives within wanna have a walk in the sunshine too. But you tell him to be nice and not hurt the poor villagers because that dark milleania had passed and it's a new gleaming brand new century - and polish your act. Because baddies nowadays should be suave and classy. 


Nobody but the vilest and craziest would want to be called a criminal. I am just a bad guy trapped in a good family. A morbid guy who is trying to be nice. Black heart who seeks the ray of light in people's life. 


It's tough to be me.